The Definitive 15-Step Picture Guide to Giving Someone a Hickey

During a passionate makeout session, giving your partner a hickey can feel great and serve as a playful way to mark them as "yours." But how do you give someone a hickey, and what's the…

  1. 1

    Recognize the meaning of the term "hickey" Hickeys are bruises on the skin caused by sucking on or making an aggressive kiss to another person. The broken blood vessels under the skin cause the initial redness. As it heals, it'll change color to a purple or dark brown. [1]

  2. 2

    Learn the motivations behind your desire to hickey someone. Hickeys signify ardor and dedication. They are frequently carried out under pressure. Instead of using hickeys as a way to assert your dominance over your partner, you should give them as a sign of physical affirmation and pleasure. [2]
  3. 3

    To get anything done, you must first get permission. Due to the sexual nature of a hickey, it should not be displayed in public. It's important to check in with the person receiving the hickey to see what they're comfortable with, as some may want to avoid the potential embarrassment of being seen in public with a hickey.
    • Also, some people's moods are lowered because getting a hickey hurts. Yet this is a welcomed feature for some participants.
  1. 1

    Raise the stakes Don't go straight for the hickey by diving onto your partner's neck. First, you should spend some time just kissing and French kissing your partner, and then you can move on to kissing their throat. Begin with gentle kisses and work up to more passionate smooching around the neck and shoulders. If your partner appears to enjoy the experience, you can probably proceed to giving a hickey, but you should always double check with them first.
    • In case you've been avoiding asking permission to leave a mark on your partner's skin because the word "hickey" isn't exactly the most alluring thing to whisper in their ear, try it out and see how they react.
  2. 2

    The use of a hickey is effective on all skin types and in all locations. The neck is a common location for them. But the skin in the crook of your elbow or the inside of your thigh is also very pleasant.

    • Don't put a hickey in the middle of your partner's throat if you know that would make them uncomfortable; instead, ask them where they feel most at ease.
    • If your partner has long hair, the side or back of the neck is a good choice; otherwise, the collarbones are close enough to the shoulder that a regular crew-neck T-shirt will cover the skin.
  3. 3

    Slightly separate your lips and rest them on the skin. Lips should be pressed firmly against your partner's skin in an "O" shape to create a tight seal that won't allow air to escape. Keep a warm smile on your face and a soft, inviting mouth as you do this. [3]

  4. 4

    Sucker the flesh Breaking the capillaries just under the skin is the goal here, but too much force could injure your partner. Twenty to thirty seconds of suckage is required for a lasting impression. Remember:

    • Get those teeth out of the way! You don't want them to cause your partner any discomfort by digging into their skin. If your partner so desires, you can use your teeth lightly to increase the sensation.
    • The sucking must be broken up. If making a hickey for 30 continuous seconds is too weird, try making one for 10 seconds, then kissing, then making another one for 10 seconds, and so on.
    • Make sure you don't spit out too much saliva. If you want to avoid leaving a creepy drip of slobber on your partner's neck as you give a hickey, try to hold back any extra saliva.
  5. 5

    Put a calm conclusion on it. After you've had your fill of sucking, give the tender spot a few tender kisses. Get back to your regular sex routine.
  6. 6

    Just give it a few minutes for the hickey to show up. It takes time for the hickey to become visible, just like a bruise. After 5 or 10 minutes, you should see something that's a shade of pink or purple.

  7. 7

    If you and your partner both prefer a more subdued atmosphere, feel free to turn down the lights. Get the job done by going back to where you started. Or relocate to a new location if that's what's needed

  8. 8

    Don't ignore a stop command. Perhaps your partner is "okay" with hickeys in theory, but really despises the way you have to perform the act. Maybe your significant other doesn't want their parents or boss to see the tattoo. Even if you've already started something, you should always listen to your partner if they say "no." Abusing the trust symbolized by a hickey is unacceptable.
  1. 1

    Use some makeup concealer When it comes to hiding a hickey, a little bit of heavy makeup or concealer can go a long way. Make sure to choose a shade that works well with your skin tone, and don't forget to blend! [4]
    • You could use some thick, heavy stage makeup to hide a real whopper.
  2. 2

    Put on a scarf. Since scarves are currently in style (unless it's 100 degrees outside), they are perfect for hiding a hickey on your neck without drawing unwanted attention to the sore spot. If you're trying to hide a hickey by wearing a scarf around your neck, be sure to check your reflection periodically to make sure the scarf is still in place and not revealing your hickey. [5]
    • Wearing a turtleneck (when the weather permits) or letting your hair down (if it's long enough) are two other options for hiding a neck hickey.
  3. 3

    Bandage it up! A hickey can be hidden from public view and given time to heal with the help of a band aid.

  4. 4

    Make an effort to hasten recovery. Some people have found success using arnica cream to remove hickeys because of its purported ability to hasten the healing process for bruises. Some other common home treatments include icing the area, rubbing the hickey with a comb, scraping it with a coin, and covering it with toothpaste. [6]
Inquiry New
  • Question

    Where do you recommend giving a hickey?

    wikiHow Staff Editor

    Editors of wikiHow
    Staff Response
    This response was authored by a member of our expert research team and has been checked for accuracy and completeness.

    wikiHow Staff Editor

    As long as the recipient is comfortable, you can give them a hickey wherever you like. The hickey should be placed where it will be concealed by the wearer's hair or clothing.

  • Question

    To what extent do hickeys provide pleasure?

    wikiHow Staff Editor

    Instructional Editors at wikiHow
    Provided by the Staff
    Someone on our expert research team drafted this response, and we've checked it for both accuracy and completeness.

    wikiHow Staff Editor

    This varies widely from person to person. Hickeys are often considered enjoyable, if not downright painless, by their recipients. However, they may be uncomfortable for some people, which is a drawback that is debated by many but not by all. Find out what works best for you and your partner by experimenting together.

  • Question

    Is it risky to get a hickey?

    wikiHow Staff Editor

    Copyeditors on Duty at wikiHow
    The Staff's Reply
    One of our expert researchers drafted this response, and we've had it checked for both accuracy and completeness.

    wikiHow Staff Editor

    Hickeys are generally safe. Someone with an open cold sore or oral herpes infection could potentially transmit the virus to their partner through a hickey. It is possible for hickeys to leave behind some light scarring in extremely isolated cases.

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